How to stop getting yourself into a mindfu*k over other people

October 13th, 2017, posted in Change, Consciousness

The beauty of life is that is divinely chaotic in its natural order and everything that comes to us teaches us; to be stronger, braver, more forgiving, more giving, more faith, more love… you name it, in a situation that feels chaotic, traumatic and painful there will be something to learn and the greatest lesson to seek is that of compassion for ourselves and of others,  it is through this gateway of compassion that we see the truth from our soul, the wisdom of the greatest picture and a the gift of a peaceful mind.

There will be no peace in the world if there is no peace in your mind,  so learning how bring yourself back to the reality of a moment. learning to take control of your mind, so it does not control you is the one and only thing you must invest in…  because nothing else will ever make you happy.

“Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds”

In many esoteric thinking, it is thought that we made soul contracts with the key people in our life to help each other to grow and learn the lessons we are here to learn,  I thank all those teachers who had to be the bully, the manipulator, the intimidator, the monopoliser in my life journey so far,  because they were the ones who pushed and pushed and pushed until I woke up to see that they were teaching me boundaries, showing me that I must value who I am and in most cases they were unhooking my tightly gripped fingers from something that actually no longer served me, in the pain I felt they were causing,  they were actually freeing me, teaching that I needed to let go of any victim mentality,  surrender into the great unknown and let the universe do its work.

In my journey through life I found the more I became a victim to a situation the more thoughts I would create, verifying that I was a victim! My victim thoughts would become like magnets, attracting more and more stories and reasons to verify and justify the story that I was a victim.   I would mindfuck myself over and over again, of course I would project this blame onto my perpetrator and before I knew it 95% of my thinking would be consumed by this one core thought – me being the victim!

In truth, I was becoming the victim to myself.

Just when we feel we have mastered this thinking. It can creep up to teach us in many many ways. It is so subtle and it takes courage to own when you are doing it..   ‘I’m not good enough’ ‘they don’t think I’m good enough’…  ‘its not fair’  ‘I am all alone’  ‘I don’t have time’, ‘I’m so tried’ ‘I don’t have the money’ ‘Life is hard’  poor me, poor me…

Energetically, what I learned, the weaker, more victim like I became, the more I would find a perpetrator to push me with more heavy energy.  I learned that have 2 choices, buckle into submission or wake up to what was really going on and my part in it – WHAT’S THE LESSON HERE, I ask myself.!!!  I learned that I had to change my energy so it was no longer allowing for this to happen to me anymore and that starts and always ends with my thinking! In my awakening over the past decade I had to learn to to stop being a victim to the situation – any situation.

Pull back control of your mind and say to yourself  ‘ok, I’ve fallen into the victim trap here’  give yourself a mantra, such as ‘I see with eyes of compassion for myself and others’ or whatever feels right for you – whatever it is give yourself a new story. It takes time, things don’t happen over night, and it takes commitment to change your thinking. You may find yourself saying it a 1,000 times a day… whatever, do it. get yourself out the trap – learn the lesson from eyes of compassion.

Here we have 7.5billion people all living in their own worlds, controlled by their minds, lost in thoughts, assumptions, judgements. No world looks the same, not one of us  humans will see the same thing… because  we see through the lense of our belief systems, addictions and attachments,  we see what we want to see, because it keep us  in a world where we feel safe ‘where we are RIGHT!!!

Of course, we will seek to find people who validate our own inner belief systems, we will seek out people who will affirm our ideas and expectations of how things should be,  we may well form a collusion, drawing people into our drama, but here the only good that will ever come from this is more drama, more mindfuck, more peoples opinions, eluding you from your own souls truth.

Our minds, have this incessant need to ‘know’ so if it doesn’t have the answers, it will make them up based on assumptions! If you chose to walk down the path  of  ‘assumption’ about someone else’s situation, or assume what they are thinking, assume how they are doing, assume from what pieces of the puzzle on Facebook you can gather, the only answers you will get will be based on WHO you are and not who THEY are.  All your assumptions are essentially lies you’re telling yourself to try and find an answer and while you’re on that messy path to assumptions, you will have to check in with yourself that you’re not being dishonest to affirm and validate your victim story. Lies only lead you into the place of being a victim and in this place, the only one hurting you is YOU.

We can never assume, we can only ask. If your mind fuck is based on assumptions then do yourself a favour. Ask and if its not your place to ask then you may have you ask yourself the question of why you feel this involves you?  A human who is controlled by their mind loves nothing more than to finger point. But as Bob Marley says ‘ before you point your fingers, make sure your hands are clean’.

‘Through judging we separate,  through understanding we grow’ – Doe Zantamata

When we step out  this victim mentality, we finally release ourselves and our perpetrators from this fucking tiresome contract. They don’t want to be a perpetrator as much as we don’t want to be a victim. Learn your lesson and move on, let this drama fade away and get on with your lives. Wish for everyones peace of mind. See with compassion